Is it just me, or do I feel that there's always a wall between me and others? Don't ask me why, but I always find it hard to be the odd one out, and the on e who doesn't have the courage to ask to join them because they seem so good and amicable and it just feels weird that I wanted to join them, and even if I walked with them sometimes I just feel like I'm theodd one out. ):

Okay fine yes I'm lonely and I find it hard to make friends when they already have their own group to begin with. I don't know why, but I'm never good with words. I tend to rub people the wrong way, even though I don't mean it. (Seriously!)

Oh god what should I do? They're reallly really good people and I seriously wanna be good friends with them but I find it so hard to do so! ARGH ):

Labels: Daily Rants

I'm practically very tired. (physically + mentally) hahaha.

I'm so tired that I have to look at one bleeding equation twice just to realise that it's the same equation. Whatever enters my left ear exits from my right ear and vice versa. That's realllllly bad for lectures haha.

My memory's failing me when I'm tired too lol. I wasn't really thinking about anything this whole day! Okay this is bad.

I guess I should try and sleep early already.

Nevertheless, I'm happy that I settled two lecture quizzes and just one more week! Yes!! One more to the hols, and I can rest officially after 11th August for a week. (Before maniacal mugging again.)

): So yeah. I need my sleep, I need my laughter and joy, and I totally need games. ):

Labels: Daily Rants

Didn't had much progress today. I think I should continue doing maths now. I now den realized there's another quiz this week! Sigh. Monday blues liao la hahahaha.

Den now my modem or router still decides to fack up. ): It's hard to connect you know. When I off my computer, I'm scared that when I on again, I can't connect to the internet. >_>"

Well, this is an excerpt from a manga. Omg I love such stuffs.

----
You know, I always did everything with Ayato.
Our clothes and belongings were always the exact same ones. Twins sure are a strange pair.
When Ayato gets hurt, I'd feel sad.
When Ayato was wounded, I also felt pain on the same spot.
I could feel him even when we were apart, until that day, when Ayato found out that he wouldn't live long.
He started living a life different from me. I tried to mimic him, but...it's not working.
I don't want to feel that again. I'm afraid of losing.
That's why, when I fell in love with you, I tried to do everything together with you.
By doing that, I can understand what's inside your heart.

The one you love, isn't me. It's Ashiya.
Because you're afraid of losing him, that's why you did not say anything.
Love, is a fragile relationship.
But, if you stay on as friends, you know you can be with him forever.
Because, if Ashiya manages to confess to you, you wouldn't be able to reject him, that's why you dated me.
Just so Ashiya couldn't confess to you, isn't that right?
----

Labels: Daily Rants

Have you ever experienced a day where it was so awesome yet there's always someone to rain on your parade? And that person, for the day, and for most of my days, are my sister. Wanna know why? Here goes this short, (yet is a draggy story.)

Today, I had this really awesome day going out with my classmates. (Yes 4E2 still rocks!) Had a pretty good dinner, saw Daryl (Ages since I ever saw him), and caught two of the movies that I really really wanted to watch (Sorcerer's Apprentice and Nodame Cantabile: Finale). So, after this whole happy happy day, I went home...and I shouldn't really do that. It was a pretty bad decision.

So, I reached home, and yes, as usual, my sister is still not home (14 only, and she goes out till wee hours during weekends) (Weekly basis okay. Once in awhile still okay.). And whenever my sister is not home, my mum and me usually suffer the wrath of my dad. (Hello? It's not our fault that she doesn't want to come home.) Apparently she still complains that we don't give her enough freedom.

Have you realized that letting you go out so late when you're 14 is already good enough freedom? Do you really want to be grounded to realize that you have no freedom at all?

In addition, whenever my mum calls her, she does not pick up the phone. She'll press the REJECT button. CAN YOU JUST FUCKINGLY PICK UP YOUR STUPID PHONE? If they don't care about you, would they even CALL you?

So this leads to her having to resort to sms-ing her. Yet, she doesn't know how, so what happens? I have to sms her every facking 10 minutes, and have to bear the constant same question by my mum. "She reply already anot? Why so long de? Can send another sms anot?"

HELLO. She even does this when I'm doing work. Not to be rude, but it will sound really rude. I have things to do. I have quizzes to take. I have my grades to get. Can you stop disturbing me when I'm writing tutorials, reading notes, just to get a daughter who don't even know that she have so much freedom home?

I'm fed up. Okay? VERY FED UP. Why. Why do I have to suffer because of someone enjoyment? Why am I burdened with this? Why? If it's because I have a handphone, I'll JOLLY give up mine to get rid of all this.

And yes, I'm waiting for the day that she'd realize how much freedom she already had, yet she still says it isn't enough.

P.S: CAN YOU FUCKINGLY ANSWER THE FUCKING CALL?

P.P.S: CAN YOU JUST COME HOME EARLY? WHY MUST WE SUFFER WHILE YOU ENJOY OUTSIDE?

P.P.P.S: Don't force me to the extent that I really SNAP. That day might come soon if you still act like that.

Labels: Daily Rants

Tired of everything.

Labels: Daily Rants

Everyone have their ups and downs in life, and there are times where you find yourself in the middle of nowhere.

I think the weather is getting into me. I feel so tired, lethargic, and pretty much sick of everything in life. I don't know what happened that made me feel like this, but I just can't find any motivation since...yesterday.

Sometimes I'd wonder, why is it so hard to find something to motivate you to move on? Why the passion that was once here, can disappear in an instant?

It's a mystery that I think I'll never know.

P.S: I think UO was okay :D That's a plus. ;)

P.P.S: I want to get the novel Eat, Pray, Love!! :D

That Time of Year - Sick Puppies
----
Another year
has come and gone again
look around
and think where have you been
trace the lines
on your face tonight
and don't forget
that this will pass in time

It's cold out this morning
you should be getting into bed
can't believe its that time
of year again

Curled up tight
a darker shade of white
thinking back could be
here for a while

Its cold out this morning
and it's getting harder to pretend
can't believe it's that
time of year again

Can you believe the life you led?
did you achieve the goals you set?
did you lose your mind?
now and then

Is there a reason you won't mend?
it is a season that won't end
can't believe its that
time of year again

Another year
has come and gone again
look around
and wonder what happened

It's cold out this morning
you should be getting into bed
can't believe its that time
of year again

We're fresh out of warnings
maybe it's time you called a friend
forget that it's that time
of year again

Forget that it's that time
of year again
----

Labels: Daily Rants

I realised that my blog abbreviation is just so weird.

previous blog: s-o-s.blogspot.com.

current blog: p-o-o.blogspot.com

SOS and POO. Haha.

Okay. This just shows that I'm bored, and I'm stressed up. (:

I have the feeling that I'll screw the paper that starts at 9am so badly.

Labels: Daily Rants

Labels: ARGH, Daily Rants

Argh I'm so stressed up! There's a lab report to complete, and 4 tests next week!

But it's good nonetheless, I just hope that I can clear everything and enjoy my study break haha. Well not study break, but it should be study month. So I guess I'll take a break for the first week, and chiong like a mad bull for the following three weeks.

I'm kinda sad though. There are so many movies to watch, and so little time! ):

This is just a quick update haha. But I had a realllll good day today! :D Got my mangas, but........the cd I wanted...I didn't get it. ):

Labels: Daily Rants

Random stuffs coming right up:
----
Have you ever experienced a situation where both sides refuse to budge, even for an inch?

Sometimes when such situation happens, there's nothing you can do. Nothing. Everyone wants what they desire so much, who would care about what you want?

Selfless people are hard to find. Seriously. No one can totally be as selfless as they can be. Haha. Thought about this after some things happened in the past that I remembered.
----
Ever thought that love hurts? Actually love doesn't hurt. It's reality that hurts. Which is why certain people decided to live in fantasies, rather than reality because fantasy is a sanctuary.
----
Trust. Something that needs to be present in any kind of relationship. It's like the basic building blocks in a social life. Without it, where would you go? What would you do?
----
Life. What is it that you really want from it? Fame, glamor, fortune, happiness? When you stop asking for more, desiring for more, you'd realise that how simple and beautiful life is just by having little bits and pieces of happiness everyday.
----

And that's all for the random bits and pieces of my thoughts. Haha! :D

Vintage songs are nice. Seriously. For example, Dream A Little Dream of Me.

It's a song where you can just lie down on bed, close your eyes, relax and sleep. I guess I'll try that today cause I'm suffering from insomniac. And I have lessons tomorrow and a lecture quiz on Tuesday and PBL due on Thursday with a ET report due two weeks later (According to Pavi).

._." Busy as hell and I hope that August comes soon. (1mth to study and rest. I guess I'll use 3 weeks to rest lor hahaha.)

I know I'm random but eff that la okay.

Labels: Daily Rants

Omg this song is soooo nice (:

----
I love you, from my heart...
I love you forever, we do...

Those wonderful days when you are always by my side,
from morning until night.
When I opened my eyes, you held out a cup of hot coffee,
and I held tightly onto your arm.

I counted down the days on my fingers until I was able to see you again.
The days we spend with each other have overtaken the days that we spend alone.
Who'd ever thought that we'd find this sort of happiness?
But you and me, we did. We fell in love.

I love you, everything about you.
This is the first time I've ever felt this way.
I love you, always and forever.
These feelings will never change.
----

(:

Labels: Daily Rants

I finally got dragged down by all the stress and work lately, and finally, I raised the white flag and got sick. Some part of me thinks that getting sick is actually not a bad thing, as it provides me a way to fully rest before fighting the war called "studies" again.

Yet another part of me worries about all the things I'll miss during these few days. Ironic, isn't it? It's like being in the middle, being dragged by two different people hahaha. Bad metaphor but I thinks it's logical lolz.

Sigh, I guess I'm really tired that I'm having the same recurring dreams again. The kind of dreams that I never wanted to dream, the faces that I never wanted to see again. ):

It just made me realised that deep down, I've never forget about it. It's really hard to forget. (: It's like living a nightmare over and over, and I can never get out of it. That seriously sucks.

So, it's a bad day for me, and this song always manages to make me smirk a little and move on. Sometimes music is what you need for a seriously bad day.



Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
And I don't need no carryin' on

'Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
(You had a bad day) ~ 2X

Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on

You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day

(Ohhh! Holiday!)

Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong

So where is the passion when you need it the most
Ohhh! you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

'Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
(You had a bad day) ~ 2X

(Had a bad day) ~ 5X.....End (:

Labels: Daily Rants